Ode to the Mom...

Today is my mom's BIRTHDAY!!!

So I wanted to give her a very special blog shout out!! :)

Today, my mom is turning 55...

so I thought I'd do 55 things that I love about my mom!

1. She is so kind.

2. She is always taking care of me.

3. She loves my dad more than anything,

4. She loves her kids.

5. She loves us AND she constantly shows us she does.

6. She LOVES being a grandma.

7. She acts like a child when the grandkids are around.

8. She has a hard time saying "no".

9. She spoils me.

10. She gets crazy when she is tired.

11. She has gone to every important concert and event that any of us were a part of.

12. She denies that she's crazy! ;)

13. She is so fun!

14. She taught me how to bake.

15. She makes the world's best cookies.

16. She makes some pretty tasty pies, too!

17. She is actually a really good cook all around.

18. She taught my sisters how to be really good mothers.

19. She taught me how to be a good mom, too... I just haven't put it to use yet.

20. She adopts all of my friends as her own kids.

21. She loves it when my friends call her Mama Nichol.

22. She loves Disneyland almost as much as I do!

23. She has loved me, unconditionally, for 23 years.

24. Today, she told me I was her favorite Birthday present.

25. When I told her I was born 3 and a half weeks before her birthday, so I didn't really count as a present, she told me the best presents always come early.

26. She is obsessed with Penguins.

27. She acts like a child when she hears the word penguin.

28. She has a season pass to the Living Planet Aquarium just so she can go see the Penguins any time she wants.

29. She loves being with her family.

30. She loves chocolate.

31. She makes really good treats.

32. She is funny.

33. She is loving.

34. She is generous.

35. She sings when she has saggy socks.

36. She gives great hugs.

37. She always makes me feel better when I have a bad day.

38. No matter how hard I try... I can't hide anything from her.

39. She always knows when something is wrong with me.

40. Her grandkids think she is awesomely cool.

41. Her grandkids think she is fun to play with.

42. She gave me her good looks! ;)

43. She and I share clothes.

44. She loves Bear Lake.

45. She has taught us all to play at Bear Lake.

46. She passed on her love of Bear Lake to my dad and the rest of us.

47. She likes to read books with her grandkids.

48. She let's me come visit her at work and take her to lunch.

49. She taught us to love music.

50. She has the best parents, so we are very close with them.

51. She loves her mother-in-law and has one of the best relationships with her.

52. She is very helpful.

53. She has to have me help her work her phone.

54. She loves the Gospel. And taught us how important the temple is.

And best of all..........

55. She is my best friend.

I love you, Mom! Thanks for being the best mom in the world! I can't imagine where I would be without you! You are amazing and I am so grateful I chose to be one of your kids!

ugh.

have you ever been in one of those moods... and you can't explain why you're in it? it's a strange feeling, really. i feel like i'm in a funk. i do this every so often. maybe it's part of being a girl. stupid hormones. or maybe everyone has their funks. i don't know.

it's not like today was bad. or tonight at work was terrible. neither are even close. my day was great! i got to hang out with abby and i took her lunch. and work was totally fine. it was the same as it is on tuesdays and thursdays. busy for like an hour... and by 7:30 it's pretty slooow. which is great. because then paul can stay and talk to me and hang out for a bit. :) i love it when paul visits. he hates it, but i really do enjoy it. ha ha (i don't think he actually hates hanging out at the front desk and talking to me for so long... or else he wouldn't do it, right? i think he just likes to pretend to complain about it...) 

paul is so funny! he is usually so busy and running around like a chicken with his head cut off trying to get a million things done in a day. so it makes me feel good if i can get him to hold still for longer than 3 seconds! (that's right, two hours is quite an accomplishment! i rock! ha ha just kidding.) paul really is awesome. we've had some great chats, some that weren't so great, and some that were definitely interesting (the one involving la jolla, california... interesting? yes.. super funny? most definitely.. was it all brilliant? oh yeah..)

it is going to kill me when paul leaves on his mission. dimple dell really won't be the same. oh yeah, that's right. one more missionary. i have found myself another friend to write. go figure. ha! thanks, for proving my friends right. paul. they said i'd find another friend to write. drats. :) but i'm so excited for you. japan is getting one freaking excellent missionary!

but paul... i hate "fighting" with you. even when it is all fake. ha ha it's ridiculous, but even fake fighting puts me in a bad mood. so i'm sorry if i'm ever crabby when you're giving me a hard time. i try really hard not to think about it. and keep in mind... i am a girl. and sometimes we can't help but get insecure. however, tonight's bad mood wasn't your fault... so i really am sorry you thought i was grumpy with you at the end of the night.

tonight's bad mood came from another member of the male gender. i have to admit... it drives me crazy when people bail. (really, who doesn't that bug?) but when people give me crap about "never hanging out" "being too busy" etc., etc., etc. and then i try to make plans with them... like so....

boy:"we never hang out. when can we hang out?"
me: "when can you?"
boy: "my schedule is pretty open now that i just finished my classes."
me: "okay, how about this weekend? friday or saturday?"
boy: "i think either would work.. but saturday would probably be better."
me: "okay, let's do saturday then."
boy: "okay, what do you want to do? it needs to be cheap because I'm trying to save money."
me: "oh, that's fine. i'm okay with whatever you want to do."

. . .  two days later . . .  

boy:"hey, are you working?"
me: "i sure am!"
boy: "you suck. ha ha jk. i was going to watch a movie so i was going to see if you wanted to come chill."
me: "oh, sorry."
boy: "it's fine, what time do you get off tonight? 10?."
me: "yes!"
that's too late, woman."
me: "too late for what?"
boy: "too late to hang out."
me: "sorry!!"
boy: "it's okay. we'll hang out another night."
me: "yeah, aren't we hanging out on saturday?"
boy: "yeah, i guess we could. i have a wedding reception and then i might have a date. but i'm not sure about the date."
me: "let's just hang out another time." <---why bother to make plans when they forget about the plans anyway??? am i the only one finding the conversation he and i had two days before this one completely pointless??

then like fifteen minutes before i was off work the boy said... do you want to come chill or should i go to bed? i thought he had said it was too late to hang out!?! make a decision and stick to it, dammit. i told him i was going home. ha ha

ugh. boys are stupid sometimes.

23 birthdays.....

I've had some amazing birthdays! But I really must admit that I feel like this year's was one of the best!! It was an insanely busy day!

I usually spend my birthdays with my parents! They are always fabulous!! My 21st birthday my parents took Maggie and I to The Roof for dinner and then we walked around Temple Square. It was really fun! And I'm so glad Maggie came with us! Last year, for my 22nd birthday, my parents and I went to Asian Star for dinner and then to see The Blind Side! We LOVED the movie! And dinner was delicious, as always!!

This year.... was different. I knew it would be. My parents' ward had their Christmas party the night of my birthday. The parents were in charge of a lot of the food. So they had to attend it. I worked on my birthday this year (I know, weird for me, but I thought it was time to act like a grown-up). So I got up early so I could shower and get ready before I had to go in. My parents were just getting ready to leave for work so I got to see them for about 5 minutes at 7 a.m. I went in and worked until 3 p.m. But during work I had some really cute deliveries! Abby brought up balloons to tie on to my computer. And Misty, Greg, and Tasha brought me in MORE balloons! All the patrons asked who was having the birthday and I got millions of birthday wishes from complete strangers! It was embarrassing, but very sweet of everyone to think of me!! After work I went over to the Blackhurst's home and made a banner for the missionary! After I finished that I went to dinner with Kade, Tara, Mia, Kristen, and Abby! We went to The Olive Garden and it was very tasty!! (Thanks, Abby, for paying for my dinner!) After dinner, Abby and I ran to Old Navy and bought me a new sweater! (I had forgotten to pack extra clothes to change into after work, so I was in a shirt from The Dell and I looked gross and homeless!!!) After the Old Navy trip we went to Kade and Tara's to hang out and we watched "17 Again".  As soon as it was over I had to head back over to the Blackhurst's house so we could head to the airport and pick up Zach!!! Zach was supposed to land at 10:37 p.m., but his flight had been delayed until 11:13! Poor Elaine! The wait almost killed her! Zach FINALLY got off the plane and we all got HUGE hugs! I'm not really family, so I stood in the back and let his family hug him and celebrate... but then he spotted me! He looked at me and said, "BRINDI!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!" And gave me the biggest and best hug I've gotten in a long time!! (Like Wa-wa... oh how I have missed those hugs, Little Brother!) I couldn't believe he remembered it was my birthday! I told Zach he was the best birthday present ever! We went back to the house and hung out for another two hours! It was so nice to visit with him! I have missed my little brother so much! I finally got home at about 2:30 a.m. talked to my parents and headed downstairs.... There I found my door completely decorated! Misty had come to my house to decorate my door! (It's our birthday tradition around here. You can see the pictures from last year on my blog post here, in my recap of '09.) While she was here decorating, Nick, Stephen, and Jared came to visit me.. they called while I was at the airport, but I guess they had a surprise for me... so they left it in front of my door. They got me SUPER cute slippers!! Such cute boys they are! Thanks again, fellas! I love you all! Finally, I was in bed by 3!! It was a verrry long day, but so very worth it!! :) I got a million texts, a handful of phone calls, and a million FB messages wishing me a happy birthday throughout the day. I had no idea I was so loved by so many!! Thank you, everyone!

Tonight we had the family party! It was so fun!! I love my family, but it is always chaos when we're all together! There are 17.5 of us now... and that turns a house into a zoo in a hurry! We had homemade Costa Vida chicken salads for dinner! They were so good! We had them last year for the family birthday party and they were such a hit that they were requested again for this year. My mom is so awesome and worked so hard to make dinner a success. I love her! (I made the tortillas... actually, I just cooked them... but in doing so, I burned my fingers... this is why I shouldn't be trusted in the kitchen!) After dinner we had F.H.E. Colby gave the lesson. He read a story out of one of the Friend magazines. (story found here.) He did such a good job! Sometimes I forget he is 8!! After the lesson we had a family prayer. It seems strange, but there is something so powerful about an entire family kneeling down for a family prayer. We then opened presents. We were celebrating our three December birthdays- Me, Blake, and my mom, so there were a lot of presents. Blake got a Thomas the Train, a Playmobil racecar, new jammies, and a Buzz Lightyear. My mom got a cookbook and a Playmobil penguin set (my mom is obsessed with penguins and Playmobils...), and Kacey and Josh have my mom's present, but Kace refused to celebrate my mom's birthday so early. She is waiting until it is closer. I got the new Keith Urban CD, a gift card for iTunes, and Kacey and Josh are taking me to The Hale Center Theatre to see "A Christmas Carol". After presents we all hung out for a little bit, and in the meantime the kids were off to do their own thing. Oh man! At 7:40 p.m. I was super sick of the screaming, fighting, and over-all loud noise going on!! So we finally had ice cream and brownies (since I don't really like cake due to the frosting...) and everyone packed up to leave. I love my family, but family functions can be exhausting!! ha ha

Thank you EVERYONE for making my 23rd birthday so excellent!! I honestly have the greatest friends and family in the entire world!! I love you all!!

(I'll put up pictures on this post tomorrow! .............. as soon as I find the cord to my camera to download pictures onto my computer! ;) )

It is officially...

DECEMBER!!!

My favorite month!

There are just so many reasons why December is such an excellent month!! So many things to love about December!!

1. It's my birthday month! 

     -I actually share my birthday month with a lot of people I know! The 1st through the 7th-my cousin, Jennica (1st), Oakland Hinkley (1st), Jackie Colton (2nd), Britney Spears (2nd), (I'll get to the many on the 3rd...) Elise Reneer(4th), Julie Osborne(4th), Kelly Strebel(4th), Megan Casperson (5th), Tyson Case (6th), Brianna Newton (7th). The 8th through the 14th- Kody Cook (9th), my cousin Lindy's husband, Mason Smith (10th), Fielding's mom, Terri Smith(11th), My Blakey (12th), Jeri Brown (13th), Shella Durling (14th). The 15th through the 21st- Mandy Merriman (15th), Dianna Freeman (15th), Daniel Burgess (16th), Taylor Keffeler (17th), Ai Blackhurst (18th), Jessie Rossi (20th), Vienna Goates (21st). The 22nd through the 31st- Brandie Hansen (22nd), Becky Terry (22nd), Tanner Barlow (23rd), Victoria Anderson (23rd), Kelley Gwinn (25th), My mom!! (27th), Stephanie Taylor (27th), Leda Chavez (28th), Megan Guest (28th), Shelley Bradfield (28th), Brent Jessop (30th), and Taylor Nordquist (31st)!!! I probably forgot a few.. so I'm sorry if I did! But I think you get the point!

2. My Birthday is 3 weeks before Christmas, so decorations can go up as soon as my birthday is over and they're still up for a pretty good amount of time!

3. I get to share my birthday with some of the most amazing people I know!

     -My dad's good friend- Jeff Goodell, two of my cousins: Eileen Rojas and Heather Olsen, the funniest woman I have ever known- Nic Hillary, two friends from elementary school- Kristin Barnhill and Stuart Rogers, the beautiful Kendyl Bell, my friend Brandon's dad- Ron Strebel, Then there are a few "famous people" I share a birthday with- Brendan Fraser, King Charles VI, Rowland Hill (the inventor of the first adhesive postage stamp..) Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, Daniel Bedingfield, Anna Chlumsky (she was the main girl in "My Girl"), Amanda Seyfried, and Michael Angarano. (there are a LOT more, but I didn't really know any of them... so I didn't put them on here..)

      -OH! And a couple I'm not terribly proud of... Ozzy Osbourne and the famous Polygamist- Warren Jeffs. And my sister's dog, Buster.

4. Maggie's half birthday is in December! (on Christmas, actually...)

5. I know THREE missionaries coming home this month!! And all three of them are kinda like my little bothers!! Var Black gets home TOMORROW! Zach Balckhurst gets home on Friday!! (He left on my birthday and he's coming home on my birthday! He served exactly two years! How cool is that??) And Dustin Wilson gets home on the 18th!! So exciting to be getting all these men back home!!

6. It's Christmas!!!

     -I LOVE all the Christmas lights!

         -Especially down at Temple Square!

     -I LOVE the whole feeling of the Christmas season!

     -I LOVE having a Holiday devoted to the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

     -I LOVE spending so much time with my family!

     -I LOVE Christmas Music! (December is the only month I'll listen to it..)

     -I can watch The Grinch as many times as I want during December and NO ONE can tell me I'm crazy! Like they do when I watch it in March, June, August, October, etc.)

     -I LOVE giving gifts to the people I love and making them happy!

     -I LOVE Carolers!

     -I LOVE Strawberry Waffles on Christmas morning at my Grandparents' house!

I hope everyone enjoys this amazing month as much as I do!! :) Enjoy the holiday! (And for many of you, your birthdays!!)

"Let it be thanks we're givin'!"

For those of you who have read my blog for the past year, you all know it has been a rough one. (sorry, for being a Debbie Downer...) But for all of this I am very grateful. I know it sounds so crazy, but without hard times, we wouldn't know what the good ones were like. So thank you all for sticking by me as I haven't always acted like myself! 

We have had too many loved ones who have passed away. We've known others who have also lost loved ones. And we have had many friends in and out of the hospital. But because of this... I have grown closer to those who are still here with us. And I have learned how grateful I am to know of the Plan of Salvation!

I am so grateful for my family and all of their love and support. I think I got blessed with the best parents. They are both so amazing and have put up with so much from me! I am grateful to have an amazing relationship with my dad, because he never had one with his own. I'm grateful he tried so hard to make sure we knew how much he loves us! (I'm sorry you lost your father yesterday, dad, and that you never got to have a relationship with him. But thank you for learning from his mistakes! And treating all of us like we are the most important things in the world!) I am grateful that my mom is one of my best friends! I am grateful for three incredible siblings! Who all let me be their kids' favorite aunt! I am very grateful for my 5 nephews and 3 nieces and that mystery baby!! (Tara and Kade will find out what they are having next Thursday, December 2nd.) I am grateful to have three (out of six, yes, six) grandparents alive and kickin' it! My mom's parents are so awesome and I am so so lucky to have such an incredible relationship with them! My dad's mom (now the last grandparent alive on my dad's side) is amazing! She is 90 and you'd never guess it! I am so grateful to have such a loving grandma!

I am grateful for all of my friends! I can't even tell you how often my friends save me! They are all so incredible! And I am so very lucky to have so many people close to me who love me so much!

I am grateful to work at Dimple Dell! :) Four and a half years later and I still love it! I have met so many great people because of that place! I love my coworkers! And I am so grateful to have friendships with them!

I'm grateful for HAIR!! I LOVE being a cosmetologist! Going to hair school was the best decision I've ever made! It has brought people into my life that I really needed. And it has also brought me so close to my family members! I love that my cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents love me enough to support me and let me do their hair! I have developed such great relationships with all of them... and for that... I am extremely grateful!!

I am grateful for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! Without it, my life would have no meaning! I would be so lost! I am so grateful for the Book of Mormon! And oh how grateful I am to have amazing church leaders!

I am so grateful for this time of year and the reminder it is to have us all realize how blessed we are! I am grateful for the reminder to tell the ones we love how much we love and adore them! I am grateful for the Holidays and the time we get to spend with family!

I love all of you! I am so grateful to know you!! And so grateful for your love and support! Happy Thanksgiving!! I hope you all enjoyed it! And that you can each list at least two things you're grateful for this year!

Who do I blame...

for this white crap outside?

This snow is down right outrageous! And the wind before it was insane!! I'm so glad I didn't have to go to work tonight! They were worried about this storm so they closed all of the County Rec Centers around 4 p.m. today! Thank goodness! I would hate to be driving in this! Let's hope this snow doesn't stay long!

 

This one is our backyard........                                               And this one is our front door.......

Also... this snow better not continue on past tomorrow! Because on Friday we are heading to 77 degree weather in ARIZONA!! Yay for weddings! But not so yay for 12 hour car rides... 12 hours there, 12 hours back.. I might die. Or just throw up a lot! :)

Happy Week of Thanksgiving, everyone!

Just a little wish...

Since she deleted her Facebook account..... I figured I'd write it on here instead! :) (As if my 15 texts, one sent every 5 minutes, spelling out "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!" weren't annoying enough.. mwahahahaha!)

I just wanted to wish my Jenny Brooks a

very Happy 23rd Birthday today!!!

One year older and wiser, too... Happy Birthday.. to YOU!

And since you're two weeks older than I am.... I can totally tell you that you are getting OLD!

I love you, Jenny! 

I hope you have the most wonderful day!

My adopted sisters... and those I got stuck with. ;)

(First of all... I kinda stole this idea from Tara... So hopefully she doesn't mind!!)

Tara did a post on her "sisters". She is the oldest of four and the only girl... so she didn't have sisters until she married my brother and inherited Kacey, Misty, and me. But I guess really she had good friends that she claims as sisters... so it can count, right? Well Tara had an awesome blog post about all of those girls who she considers her sisters, and I LOVED it. So I am being a copy cat and doing one of my own!

The contrast between the sisters I'm "stuck with" and the sisters I got to choose really isn't as drastic as some might think. Growing up, I never felt super close to my sisters. Kacey is 12 years older than I am and Misty is 10 years older. It's kind of a big gap... and it was nearly impossible to forge a relationship with them when they were hardly ever home. Teenagers have busy lives and that's how old they were when I was young... middle school and high school age. However... now that we are older... and a little more mature... we spend a lot of time together. I would consider Kacey and Misty to be two of my best friends. My sisters are amazing! No one can argue with that! We have each been through some very different things. We all have very different opinions. And VERY different personalities. Each of us were also raised differently. It's kinda funny how we have the same parents, but had totally different experiences with them. We are all made from the same genes... but we look and act so differently! I love it all.

Kacey is my oldest sister. My mom tells me that when I was little I used to love hanging out with Kacey and her friends. When they were in High School they would come hang out at our house a lot and I always loved being with them. I was convinced I was as old as they were! Kacey moved out to go to school when I was almost 6.. And has been out of the house ever since. She and Josh got married two weeks after I turned 8. So she wasn't around the house for a big chunk of my childhood. They lived in Logan for a little while after they got married, so we didn't get to see them a whole lot. I went up and spent the weekend with them a couple of times and it was so fun. Luckily though... they weren't up there for long. They moved down here to the Salt Lake Valley a year or so after they got married and they have been about 20 minutes away from us ever since. Once I turned 16 and could drive it made it a lot easier to go hang out with Kace. But it has only been in the past five years that she and I have really become so close. She is so supportive! She has been to every thing I have ever performed in. (She and Josh are always the ones behind the cameras and video cameras. Making sure they have all the blackmail they could ever hope for!) She has helped me come out of my shell when it comes to cooking and being creative. She is also usually willing to help me out and be my model when I want to try a new way to cut hair. She has become my best friend instead of just my sister. This summer we developed an obsession with LimeRicki swimsuits and bought a few of them together! We even got suits that match! She has taught me so much! She has taught me how to cook and how to be a good mom and wife. How to be crafty. How to be handy (when our husbands aren't and daddy is too busy!) And she has even taught me how much fun Disneyland can be! ;) She is an amazing example! And so talented! I'm so glad she would share her talents with me and help me develop some of my own! (Even though I'm pretty sure I couldn't make my own Halloween costumes without her...) I am so grateful for the friendship we've been able to develop! Kace, I love you! Thanks for letting me be your tag-a-long. In High School and even now when you're mixing up a masterpiece in the kitchen.

Kacey and me in our matching bee swimsuits at Bear Lake!

Misty is my second sister. She is the sweetest person you will ever meet. She is so kind to anyone she ever comes across and she would give a complete stranger everything she had if it would help them out in life. Misty has always been "the nice one"... My mom calls her the peacemaker of our family. And she is definitely that! She always wants everyone to be happy and will take every route trying to figure out how to please us all. Misty has the most vivid imagination out of any of us! I remember loving it when she would come outside and play with me and my friends! She always made it so fun! And we always felt like we were on a real adventure, even though we were still only in the corner of our yard playing in our big sandbox. I can still remember the time I asked Misty to come play and she told me she was too busy, she didn't have time to play with us anymore. I was crushed. I know now that she wasn't trying to hurt my feelings, she really was just too busy. After that she wasn't always home a ton.. but I remember, when she was, I would go into her room and sit on her bed and just talk to her. It was usually when she'd be getting ready for a date or some school function, so she was always running around getting ready, but she would still respond to my dumb questions. I have always loved talking to her. When Misty was getting married I got to go shopping with them for her wedding dress. I was 10 and I still can't believe they let me go! ha ha I remember Misty had tried on a million dresses and hadn't really LOVED any of them yet... I had been wandering around the store (because when you're 10 you get bored easily..) and I had found the dress she had picked out of a magazine a year earlier for a project for her Adult Rolls class. Her taste in dresses had changed a lot, but I begged her to try on this dress....... guess which dress she had for her wedding. ha ha We still joke about it! And I like to think it gave us a special little bond. :) She and I have a lot of little jokes and quotes that we say to each other. No one else would understand, but they always make us smile. Misty is the one that is easiest to make cry... not just because she has the most tender heart, but because every time she laughs or even thinks about laughing, tears start streaming down her face. Misty is the sister I can tell anything to and I know she won't judge me. She is probably the most Christlike person I know. And anytime I have trouble planning my lesson for Relief Society, I know I can always ask her for help. Portfolio, I love you. Thank you for teaching me to see the good in people and especially the good in me.

This is Misty and me at Gavin's baptism!

Like a year and a half ago...

Tara is my third sister. She married my brother in 2005, but was my sister a few years before that. While Tara was "waiting" for Kade on his mission... she always had these irrational fears that he'd come home and not want to date her or marry her. (Yes, they were irrational because we all knew Kade was head over hills for her..) I would always tell her that if that happened... we'd disown Kade and adopt Tara, but either way, she would be my sister! Tara and I actually got off to a really rough start. It's true. As close as she and I are now you'd never guess it... but yes, I hated her. It's super funny to look back on it now, because the whole reason I hated her was all due to lies a girl (who had a crush on my brother) told me about her. This girl had told me she had used me to get to my brother and yet I trusted her when she said all this crap about Tara! HA! Oh how glad I am I stopped listening to her and got to know Tara. :) I seriously couldn't have hand picked a better sister-in-law! While Kade was on his mission Tara and I spent a lot of time together. Whenever she was having a bad day and really missing Kade she would come to my house and just hang out on the couch with me. She and I would talk, laugh, and cry together. And occasionally we would do a little "feet clapping". (There are very few who have been lucky enough to witness this...) We have done some crazy things together and have had some great times, great chats, and some most excellent laughs! Tara is such a great example! She has taught me so much- about friendships, family, and patience. We think a lot alike and have the same opinion on many things. She was terrified of becoming a mom (just like I am...) but she is an amazing mom! She has given me hope that even though it's scary, I could still do it! She is so cute with Miss Mia! And I know she'll be just as great with Baby Nichol #2!! Trickster, thanks for being my best friend! Sharing your child (soon to be children) with me! Thanks for understanding me! And most of all.... Thanks for improving my relationship with Kade! I love you, Tara!

Tara and Me eating super yummy S'mores!

(She hates this picture, but I really love it.)

Maggie isn't related by blood or marriage, but Maggie is my fourth sister. I have known Maggie since Kindergarten (or close to that...) but she and I didn't become friends until 6th grade. Yes, I know that sounds weird... But I was a brat. Yup, it really was all my fault that Maggie and I weren't friends before December of '99. You see... I was one of those "popular" kids in Elementary. (Really I was just popular because of my friends... But I thought I was sooo cool, so I was mean to the kids who I didn't think were as cool as I was..) I remember the day I found out Maggs was going to be in my 6th grade class. She was sitting and talking with the Recess Aid ladies (she did that a lot...) and the school had just posted the class lists for the next year. As I was passing Maggie and the ladies asked me what track I was going to be on and who my teacher was. I told them "D Track and Mrs. Coyle" and I'm sure I didn't sound happy about it, either. They said, "Oh, look Maggie! Someone who will be in your class!!" I threw up a fake smile and walked off... actually, I probably ran to tell my friends the horrible news.. "Maggie Black was going to be in our class!!" I was so disgusted! HA! Oh what I would give to go back and change my attitude! I didn't realize back then how big of a blessing Maggie and her family would be to me. We were friends for a little over two years when her family moved to North Ogden. It was hard to have my best friend so far away, but the two of us have totally made it work! Before we could drive on our own our parents would drive us back and forth so we could spend time together. I'm so glad we have awesome parents. I think they knew how much Maggie and I needed to be friends. Maggs is my other half and my guardian angel. She keeps me balanced. And sane. Without her I would be so lost. She understands me better than I do sometimes. She listens to me when I have drama with a boy or just some cute stories to share. She also slaps me back to reality when I get ahead of myself. She is never afraid to tell me the truth and she knows exactly how to break it to me. We have some crazy inside jokes that no one else would understand. We go shopping, separately, and buy the exact same outfit. We call each others' parents "Mom and Dad"... Her parents claim me as a child and my parents claim her. Maggie, I love you so much! You have taught me how to be a better person. Thank you for giving me another chance to have a friendship with you. Here's to 11 years... and another eternity more!!

Maggie and me with our matching hair!

Abby has been adopted into the crazy Nichol clan as well! HA! Poor girl! I met Abby through Tara.. and I'm sure neither one of our lives have ever been the same! Abby and I are very different... I am super open and touchy and she is most definitely not. I talk WAY too much and she is pretty quiet. (...until you get to know her.) Once she let's you in, you are stuck for life! Trust me... I've tried to run away multiple times! ;) Actually, I'm pretty sure she is the one who has tried to run! ha ha But I'm very grateful for her friendship. Abby is my entertainment! She and I watch a movie together at least once a week and we have some awesome chats! She is so funny and says some pretty hilarious things! When I grow up I want to be as witty as she is! What she lacks in height she makes up for in comebacks! That girl can have one wicked tongue! And every time it comes out I just laugh and laugh! She can be pretty sassy, but she is actually one of the nicest people I know. She has been through a lot and is one of the most grown up midgets I know! ;) I love our inside jokes and the random crap she texts me! I also love our crazy tradition of going to the Harry Potter premiers with Kade! I love you, Abby!! Thanks for sticking around and being one of my best friends! :) P.s. Here is your official Blog shout-out!! ;)

Abby and me on Halloween one year!

Jenny Jenny Jenny is my singing sister in Provo! I love that girl so much! I have known Jenny since we were tiny! But we didn't become really close friends until High School. She and I were two of the 6 sophomores that got accepted into Chamber Choir and we were both Altos so we occasionally got to sit by each other! (Until Peter got smart and changed our seating arrangements... drats!) Jenny is amazing!! She is always so positive! She made High School so awesome! We spent a lot of time together because of choir and that helped us spend even more time together outside of school. Our senior year we were in Madrigals together.. Mads was awesome!! (Shut up, Connor and Abby!) But it was so awesome because all of my best friends were in there with me and I got to spend a lot of time with my Jenny Jenny Jenny! She is such a talented singer and I always loved when we'd sit by each other! (Mostly because that one girl I usually had to sit by really couldn't sing well and made her own notes up...) We've had some pretty excellent times together! Random "Rats" soccer games with two cute boys that we had crushes on! (Why have I never gotten over my crush? ... 10 years later and I still love that stupid boy... ha ha) Miniature Golf with those same boys! One CRAZY St. George Trip... GATO! Bucky! Lesbian Cat Lovers! And Kiki and her oober random boys! Mads trip to Bear Lake and Scotty hitting on EVERY GIRL! And then there are our awesome trips to California for Choir Tour!! Every time I think of Bath & Body Works Orange-Ginger I think of our room and our feet washing party! But my favorite will always be my trips down to Provo that first semester! Sharing that tiny bed and becoming the 8th roommate! I wish we had that much time to spend together now! Now I'm lucky if I make it down there once a semester! Ha! But I LOVE that no matter what you'll always be one of my best friends! I also love that Adam misses me as much as you do! Jenny B., I love you so much! And I miss getting to see you every day nearly all day!

Jenny, Heidi, Kat, and me all out to lunch one day!

Love my Mads girls!

Chelsea is a recent addition to the sisterhood! She moved into my single's branch about a year or so ago and she is one of the most incredible girls I have ever met! She is so nice to everyone! She never wants to hurt anyone's feelings! She has taught me so much about being a better friend! She does hair just like I do! And it is so fun to share that with her! I love it when she needs her hair done and she calls me to have me do it! I enjoy every minute I am with this girl! She is so fun and just so darling! It's funny how the Lord knows exactly what you need and places people in your life that He knows will help you the most. This girl has seriously saved me! She has no idea how much I needed her friendship! Chels keeps me active and she reminds me how important the gospel is. She truly has the light of Christ with her always!! Chels, I just love you! Thank you so much for your friendship and always being willing to help me plan my Relief Society lessons! You're amazing!!

I don't have a picture with Chels... so I'll work on that!

Heather is like my twin soul! Kinda... I'm pretty sure she is the nicer version of me! (I'm 8 months older, so I'm pretty sure Heavenly Father was taking that time to make adjustments!!) I met Heath when I moved to Riverton five years ago... She was the bishop's daughter so the poor girl kinda got forced into being my friend by her mom! It was my first Sunday in our ward and she and her mom walked up to me and my mom and introduced themselves.. Cindy found out Heather and I were about the same age so she made Heather take me to Sunday School with her. Poor girl! I'm not sure she knew what she was getting herself into! ha! We quickly became good friends and discovered how alike we are! We spent a lot of time together... and she even came up to Bear Lake with my family! We had this bet after High School of who would get married first.... and guess who lost? She did! So now she has to sing at my wedding! BAHAHA! Heather has the best husband ever! Jason is so funny and he makes her so happy! So I am so grateful she met him! Heath, you are so beautiful and I love you so much! Thanks for being a better version of myself! :)

Heath and me doing a 27 dresses pose!

This was at her wedding luncheon!

These last two are super recent additions! But I can no longer imagine life without them... Remember that earlier mention about how the Lord places people that I need most into my life? Debi and Kristin are just that!!

Debi is my favorite client! I met her about a year and a half ago when she happened to walk in to the salon I was working at. She just needed a quick fix, so we only put a few foils in her hair that day, but I totally fell in love with how darling she is! They had just moved to Utah from Georgia and were still moving into their new home. Oh, the awful unpacking project! :) She and I talked the whole time she was there! She came in again two days before I was leaving the salon.. and was very mad at me when she found out I wouldn't be there anymore... so she asked me if I'd make house calls. I am so glad I said yes!! I get to go hang out at her house once a month to do everyone's hair! I LOVE IT! I honestly feel like I am truly part of the family! Debi let Kenna invite me to her baptism this year and it was so awesome! Debi had me help her with Kenna's hair after she was baptized and it was the coolest experience! Thanks for letting me be a part of that, Debi!! After the baptism they made me go back to their house for the party! Yup!! I met the whole family! And every time I told them who I was they would say... "Oh! You're the hair girl! I've heard so much about you!!" Love it! I love that Debi loves to talk about me! It makes me feel special and extremely loved! However, the thing I love most about her is she is always there for me! She doesn't ever think she is, but she couldn't be more wrong. Hanging out at her house is like therapy for me. It is always so fun! I had some really rough days this summer and she was always asking me how I was doing and making sure I was okay! She is so spiritual and and always so in tune! I just love talking to her. Her kids are so cute and I adore them! And her husband Russ is amazing, too! I love this Scadden family! They are incredible! And I am so so lucky that I get to be considered a part of it to them! Thanks for all you do for me, Debi! I love you!

I don't have a picture with Debi, either! I'll work on that, too!

Kristin is Debi's youngest sister!! She FINALLY moved to Utah a couple months ago! She is seriously so freaking funny!! Debi always told me that I reminded her of Kristin and their friend Jenn Penn, she has said the three of us have identical personalities. Yeah, there shouldn't be more than one person with my personality... but there are THREE!! :) Yes, Debi was right! Kristin and I do have the same personality! The first time I saw her, once she moved here, she was kinda feeling low, so she wasn't totally herself. Which I totally understand! But a few weeks ago we went out to lunch and a movie and OH.MY.GOSH.! She was totally Kristin and that was the most fun I've ever had on a lunch date! We went to Applebee's and got the most awkward waiter you could think of! Messing with him was so much fun! Kristin and I had a blast making him blush and feel like an idiot! I am so glad she is back to being happy! She is so darling! She has been through so much and I can't imagine having to be as strong as she is! She continues to stay close to the Lord and trust in His plan! She is such an excellent example to me! Kristin, I love you! And I'm so glad you came to live in Utah!!

And I'll work on getting a picture with Kristin! :)

If you don't know these women... you are missing out! They are all so awesome and they have totally made me who I am! I honestly love and adore all of them!!

(just a random side note- I can't believe this post took me almost a month to write! ha ha)

Back from Disneyland!

We are back! The trip was awesome and we had such a good time! Disneyland was so fun! Like always. We spent three days in the park and that is prefect! Just enough time to see what you want and go on all the rides you like! And just enough time to make your legs want to fall off! ha ha

We used to fly out on Tuesday mornings, but then JetBlue changed their flight to being later. So we decided to fly out on Monday night instead. Our flight was delayed half an hour, so it was kinda nice we weren't planning on using that time to be in the park! ha ha We went to dinner shortly after we landed to the Stagecoach something-or-other and I had the best Caesar Salad I've ever had!!

We stayed at the Ramada Hotel and it was actually really nice! The rooms were great! And it's just down the street from Disneyland so we walked there and back every day!

Tuesday we spent most of the day in California Adventure. We went on California Screamin', then walked past my favorite ride, Midway Mania- which is the awesome Toy Story ride- but it was closed because they are adding in Toy Story 3 things. We went on the swing ride that took over where the other swing ride that looked like an orange was. Kacey got me to go on Mulholland Madness (which is like Wild Mouse at Lagoon... and I HATE them both.) But then I got her to go on Tower of Terror, which she hates! We went on the Jelly Fish ride and the golden rocket ride.. we were killing time to use our California Screamin' fastpass.  We grabbed lunch at the Wharf Cafe.. and I had the BEST Asian Salad in a bread bowl!! So good! We went on Soarin' Over California (which is another favorite ride of ours..) twice! We went and talked to Crush. We even went on Monster's Inc.! It was a hot day so we were trying to hit all of the air conditioned rides! :) We went on the Grizzly River Run! That ride is guaranteed to soak you! Every time!! We had done every thing we wanted to do in California Adventure, so we decided to wander on over to Disneyland while we waited for the parks to close so we could see World of Color. Over in Disneyland we found "Shirt-Girl".. I'll put a picture up of her.. I am horrible and probably going to Hell because I was sneaking pictures of this girl to make fun of her.. But she was wearing a longer tank top and SHORT short-shorts. Her tank top nearly covered all of her shorts, but she kept pulling down on it anyway to cover her bum. This girl was soaking wet, and her shorts were tan... so i'm sure they were a little see through and she was worried about people seeing her underwear..... except she pulled her tank top down so much that you could see the entire back of her bra. So really she didn't do herself any good! ha ha After shirt girl we wandered over to Pirates of the Carribean. We went to see The Tribute of Captain EO.. oh my gosh. It should have stayed in the 80s. ha ha then we did a couple other things before going back to California Adventure to watch World of Color.

World of Color is AMAZING! And a must-see!! I'm serious! It was seriously the coolest thing I've seen! Better than Fantasmic!! Bigger, too! I would honestly go back to Disneyland just for World of Color! (But I do love Disneyland, so of course that won't be the ONLY reason I go back!) The pictures really don't do it justice, so go see it for yourself!! :) Thank you Elise for the awesome suggestion! You were right, it was incredible!! And I LOVED it!

Wednesday we went to Disneyland all day! We went on Pirates, Indiana Jones, Space Mountain, Splash Mountain, and we went inside the rotating building (I don't know the actual name of it.. but I think it was the one that used to be the futuristic building..) it was super cool! We got to see the ASIMO Robot that walks and talks! It's so nerdy, but I thought it was awesome!! We went on Big Thunder Mountain a couple times. Space Mountain and Splash Mountain again.. And we even saw the Block Party. It was okay, but I miss the Parade!

Thursday was only a half day at the park. We had to be at the airport by 6:30 so we decided to leave the park by 4. It was a pretty relaxed day. We started at California Adventure and rode California Screamin' twice and then headed to Soarin' over California and rode that twice as well. We did a little bit of shopping.. picked up most of the things we needed to.. Except I forgot to get my a mom Mr. Prickle Pants... From Toy Story 3.. Sorry, Mom!! And then we headed over to Disneyland. We went on a couple of rides and then we went on the Pirate Ship! After that we headed back to the hotel to pick up our car and go get some dinner before getting to the airport. As soon as we got into Longbeach we heard that there were thunderstorms and rain in Anaheim! ha ha We got out just in time! :) We had dinner and then got through security at the airport! As we were sitting there waiting for our plane, we were told it was delayed half an hour... But really it ended up being almost 45 minutes late. We finally boarded the plane and flew home! It was a rough ride, but we all made it back safely!

It was a wonderful trip and I'm so glad I went!! Kacey and Josh are so awesome! I love spending time with them! Especially when it's in the happiest place on Earth! :)

DISNEYLAND!!!

The day has finally come! I have been counting down for a month now!! But it is finally here! Less than 24 hours from this point and I will be on a plane to California! On my way to spending three days in Disneyland!

Yes, I am almost 23 and I LOVE going to Disneyland! It is one of my favorite places on Earth! I love being able to feel like a child and go on rides! The first time I ever remember going to Disneyland I was 16. My brother-in-law, Josh, and my sister, Kacey, took me. They wanted to take their boys for the first time and decided to take me, too! I was like a giddy child walking around the park! I swear that place really is magic! It transforms people into children! Turning grown adults into five year olds! I have been back at least once a year ever since!! (There might have been one year I didn't go... But I can't remember...)

When I graduated from hair school Kacey took me to Disneyland as my graduation present!! (It's so nice that Josh works for Disney now and we can get into Disneyland for free! ha ha) It was such a fun week there! It was the first adult trip I had been on! It was just Kacey, Tara, my mom, and me! We went on the rides we wanted to and did Disneyland at our own pace. It was so nice not to have to drag the kids around!! ha ha

Well, this week is another adult only trip!! It's just Josh, Kacey, and me! I am so excited!! I love hanging out with Kacey and Josh! And I am so excited to be hanging out with them in Disneyland!! Some of my favorite things all at the same time! :)

So... to those of you not coming on our trip... Have a great week... at work... or school. :) Be safe! And I will see you all when I get back! :) I love you all!!!

Finally... a new week!!

Last week was INSANE! I'm not sure I have ever had such a crazy, busy week! We seriously had so much going on! I'm a little bit surprised we even made it out of last week alive!! 

Monday was the holiday (oh my gosh, I can't believe that was only a week ago... it feels like it has been longer than that! weird.) my mom and I went shopping, because she had the day off. We went to get Misty her birthday present... and while we were out I needed new shoes. (I know what you're all thinking.... "Brindi does NOT NEED new shoes. ever." But I did!! I didn't have any church shoes that were for cooler weather! I only had sandal type church shoes!) Anywho... we were gone for most of the day and it was so fun to hang out with my mom all day! And then hanging out with my dad after he got home from riding the horses! 

Tuesday I had to quickly throw together the double bridal shower I was throwing on Saturday... (There had been some miscommunication with all the planning... so I didn't get invitations made until Tuesday afternoon and I got them delivered to Dimple Dell by Tuesday night...) So after getting the invitations done and taken care of I did some things around the house and then went out to dinner with Nick and Denise Barfuss!! They are such a darling couple! I just love the two of them so much!! On my way home I made a stop at The Dell to drop off the invitations. Connor and Shanna were there so I talked to them for a second and then left to head to Kade and Tara's to drop off Tara's shower invitation... That is when I got the call from my mom about Blaine. I talked to her for a minute.. Drove to Kade and Tara's and then headed home to hang out with Abby. Poor Abby had a very emotional Brindi to deal with.

Wednesday was a pretty calm day... during the day. That night my parents and I had a wedding dinner to go to for my dad's best friend's youngest son, Britt. My dad and Jeff have been friends for a long time... Jeff and Lori lived in our old ward in Sandy, before moving to South Jordan and Eagle Mountain... But my dad and Jeff have worked together for nearly 30 years. But... we now live in the same ward in Riverton! ha ha kinda funny how it all came back around! :) Anyway... Britt and I grew up together so it was kind of fun going to his wedding dinner! OH! And my mom was late getting to the dinner because she had to go to a viewing for her best friend growing up, Sue's dad. (Viewing number one for the week.....)

Thursday night was Britt and Sara's wedding. I had taken the night off work so I could be there! It was so fun! We saw a bunch of our ward members and a bunch of old friends from our old neighborhood! Oh, and my mom and I had fun stealing Britt's brother's brand new baby! Little Dallin was so stinkin' cute all dressed up for the wedding!

Friday was when the week really got crazy!! We had two wedding receptions to go to... One for Melissa Taylor (a girl who lives three houses away from us...) and one for a girl I worked in the salon with, Sarah Stevens. But then we had to add on two viewings! One for Blaine and one for a lady in our ward who had fallen down a set of stairs and snapped her brain stem!! Yes, two weddings, two receptions. So crazy!! My parent's ran to Peggi's viewing and then we booked it across the street to Melissa's reception.. and then zoomed down to Blaine's viewing! We ran out of time so I didn't get to run into Sarah's reception! :( I feel so bad I missed it, but hopefully she'll understand!

Saturday we had a lot going on! I feel bad we had to cut so many things out! We had two funerals and two baby showers... ALL at the same time! We only made it to Blaine's funeral and his graveside. But we sent my sister-in-law, Tara, to my cousin's baby shower so we'd have a family representative there. :) Thanks for going, Trickster!! Blaine's funeral was amazing. It was so good. And we all cried LOTS. His graveside was equally as amazing. His family had gotten 57 white balloons, one for every year he was old, to let go after it was all over... It was fun to see them all float away together. (I even got a few pictures.) Blaine was buried in the Larkin cemetery, almost next to Elise Reneer's mom, LuAnne, so I got to visit her and I got to visit my favorite little McKallister Hinkley. Noggin, he has the sweetest spirit. I can feel it every time I visit him! Thanks for sharing him with me. :) After the cemetery my family went to lunch at Rumbi! YUM! And a great way to help get rid of our headaches from crying so much! After lunch I ran home to get everything ready for the double bridal shower!! Abby came over early and helped me get all set up! And I really think the shower went really well! I hope Taya and Megan enjoyed it! Even if it was all kind of last minute! :)

  

(These are the pictures I took at the graveside...)

Sunday finally came! I can't tell you how excited I was for it to be the end of the busy week!! My dad was speaking in church, so I went to my parents' sacrament meeting to listen to him. After their sacrament meeting I had to run to a branch missionary meeting that I was already 15 minutes late to.. after the meeting I went home to shower and get ready for my own church meetings! Yup.. four and a half hours of church in one day! Awesome! :) After church Kade, Tara, and Mia came over for dinner! And Misty, Gavin, and Tasha joined us as well!! It was super fun!

The week turned out to be pretty good. SUPER busy! But it makes me grateful for weeks like this when I only have a few hundred things to do instead of a million! :) This week I just have work, branch missionary visits, more work, and on Friday I have hair and makeovers all morning and afternoon at the Scadden's and then I'm headed to Bear Lake for the weekend! I thought I wanted to skip out on Bear Lake this weekend.... but after last week... I am looking forward to the weekend away!! Also... it'll make me feel less guilty about missing the ex-boyfriend's wedding reception that I really don't want to go to anyway. ha ha whoops!! :)

I hope all of you have calm weeks! I wouldn't wish last week upon ANYONE!!

Dear Blaine:

I probably should have written a real letter to you... months ago. When you could have read it. But I was in denial, so I didn't.

I just wanted to thank you for being such a huge part of my life. For nearly 23 years I've considered you a second dad. You lived next door to me until I was six... You were my best friend. You would hug me every time I'd come running to your house crying, because my mom or dad told me "no". You collected my tears and saved them in your pockets, and occasionally in your wallet, for a later day. You would tell me that you'd keep them until I really needed them one day. 

I remember one time I was playing with my friends... It was almost Halloween and we were talking about what we wanted to dress up as that year... We were walking past your house and you were outside. You asked us what we were doing, so I told you what we had just been talking about. You asked us all what we wanted our costumes to be... That year I wanted to be a bride. I remember you got this huge smile... and you told me I would make the prettiest bride. And one day, when I was all grown up, you were going to tell me that same thing at my wedding.

Shortly after that I remember you told me you were moving. (I was six, so I really didn't understand what divorce was, or why you had to leave me...) I remember running home to my mom and crying. Big alligator tears. I was so heart broken. My best friend was moving away. You and my parents both promised me you'd still visit and we'd still get to see you.

Many years later... You had gotten remarried. We were so excited for you! She seemed awesome... and you seemed happy. She got you back into the church. I remember the day my parents told me you were going to be ordained an Elder.. and shortly after that.. you were going to go through the temple! We were so happy for you! My parents got to be there for your endowment session... and I remember them coming home and telling me how great it was to see you so happy. That summer you came to Bear Lake with us! It was so much fun!! Our house was SO FULL!! But it was so great to spend so much time together! I remember you tipping over the canoe and losing your super expensive sunglasses! I remember everyone diving in and searching for them... but the mission was a failure. I think you're right... there is one stylish fish sporting those bad boys and showing off to his other fishy friends. I remember laughing a LOT that weekend. My cheeks hurt from smiling so much! Spending time with you was always the best way to cheer us up!

For some reason we lost contact for a little while.. I think we tried sending you an announcement for Kade's wedding and it got mailed back to us... We had your old address and after you had divorced the crazy woman with way too many children we didn't get your information updated.. But by some miracle we found some contact information for you and sent another invite... but something came up and for some reason you and Iola couldn't make it...

We are stupid and still didn't talk to you as much as we should have... We heard you and Iola had gotten married! And the two of you were doing so well! Of course!! Iola is amazing!! She brought out the cutest side of you!

The world of Facebook arose and became a huge blessing! Misty and I became friends with Jeri... My birthday is in December... and she wished me a happy birthday... in her birthday message to me she added this, "My dad wanted me to tell you "Happy Birthday" from him, too. He said that you still hold a special place in his heart and he still thinks that he needs to have the final say on your husband when you get married.. :)" I laughed so hard when I read that! Of course my husband had to have your stamp of approval! I wouldn't have it any other way!!

Two months later Misty called us on the phone... she had just read something Jeri had posted on Facebook. I don't remember what it said exactly.. But I remember it being about a brain tumor. We got her phone number right away and got the details as soon as we could. I was in shock. I cried a lot then, too. How could someone I knew have cancer? Cancer doesn't happen to the people I love! It happens to other people! My parents and I drove down to Orem the next night to visit you in the hospital the night before your big surgery. It was so good to see you!! They had just shaved your head, so you were bald! I had never seen you without hair! But I was sure glad you still had that mustache! We talked to you for a bit. Told you we love you and you'd be in our prayers. You told me you loved me. And that I get prettier every time you see me. You asked me if I was getting married yet. And reminded me you still got a say in my husband. You also promised me you'd still be at my wedding.

The surgery went pretty well.. and they started you on some heavy chemo and radiation. There were a lot of complications.. and we were all very worried. Never once did you leave my thoughts or prayers. A couple more months went by and we thought you were doing pretty well... You went in for a check up and they found another tumor. At this point... there was no longer anything they could do medically. More crying. We were going to eventually lose you, whether we liked it or not.

We decided we were going to enjoy the time we had left with you. We would always say we need to drive down and go visit Blaine. We need to check on Blaine. etc. etc. But of course.. our summers are always so packed. We'd be getting ready to go to Bear Lake and we'd say... We needed to visit Blaine before we left... and we'd be on our way home and say... we need to go visit Blaine. FINALLY about a week and a half ago.. we called Jeri and asked if we could come visit. She told us they didn't think you had much longer to be here. And really you weren't supposed to have anyone come visit but family.. But she told us we could come anyway...

I was getting ready for church and I was in the kitchen with my mom. She asked me if I was ready to say goodbye to you. Tears started flooding down my cheeks. Of course I wasn't ready for that! But... We drove down as soon as I was out of church.. I cried the whole way down. My mom told me I couldn't cry while I was there... and I tried really really hard. I promise I did. I held your hand and had a conversation with you... Then my dad came over and started talking to you... You asked him if he would say the opening prayer at your funeral... and that is where I lost it. It had suddenly become so real. I regained control of my emotions and talked to you for a bit longer. I then hugged you, kissed your cheek, and told you how much I love you. I walked away with tears running down my cheeks. I debated on talking to you about being at my wedding but thought maybe I shouldn't say anything... I was standing by my mom and we were talking to Iola... I then turned back to you... tears really flowing down... and I made you promise me you'd be at my wedding! I told you I didn't know how many strings you'd have to pull in Heaven... but that I needed you to pull them. I needed you there. You promised you'd be there. Standing right next to my parents. Don't forget your promise.

Last night my mom called me.. After getting off the phone with Jeri... Just minutes after you left this earth and returned back home with our Heavenly Father. Blaine, I am so grateful you no longer have to battle. You can finally be at peace. I am also very grateful I knew you. Thanks for letting me adopt you as a dad. Thank you for taking care of me as a little girl. Thank you for always telling me how beautiful I am. Thanks for wanting to be at my wedding since the time I was born. And most of all... Thank you for letting me be so attached to you. I love you so much. Probably more than you will ever know. I miss you so much already. But I look forward to the day I get to see you again!!

I love you!!
Love Always,
Brindi

Soft Sunday Sounds...

So lately I've been listening to a lot of church music. I used to do this a lot in high school, especially on Sundays when I'd get ready for church, or when I would drive to and from the temple. I don't even know why I fell out of the habit of listening to so much of it! I had forgotten how good it makes me feel! I love how soothing the songs are! I love the messages being sung about! And I've even noticed it helps me get ready for church quicker.

For a couple of years the Relief Society in my parents' ward made CDs of a mix of different church songs that they would give to the ladies for their birthdays. I was in that ward and a part of the relief society for two years, so I was given two of them. I have had these CDs, one for three years and the other for four years, but I hadn't listened to either one of them until just a few weeks ago. I was getting ready for church one Sunday and I just felt like I needed a pick-me-up, so I found one of these CDs and put it in. I fell in love. This CD has some excellent songs on it! Some of them are super cheesey and some of them... well, I wouldn't have chosen some of the singers... But.. they are using the talent Heavenly Father gave them, so I try and not be a brat about them. ha ha But sometimes I slip up and skip the song. ;)

I've been having a hard time lately. Sometimes I feel like my life is totally falling apart. I don't know where life is heading. I don't know Heavenly Father's plan for me. And sometimes I catch myself feeling lost. As a family, we've had a lot go on in 2010 that has had a rather large impact on me. And I am so grateful for the support system of my family! They are so amazing!! But I have also noticed that listening to all of this church music has really helped me cope with everything going on.

There is one song that I have really become attached to. It's called Every Corner of My Heart. And it is sung by Hayley Anderson. It's a short, simple song. But the music is beautiful! And the lyrics are so powerful! (Maybe one day I will sing this in my branch. ha ha ha But... probably not! Not many people in my branch know I sing.. except my friends who sit next to me every Sunday and have to listen to me!) ;) Anyway... I love this song so much that I'm going to put the lyrics on here and share them with all of you! :)

My hands don't need to feel the scars
To know who you are.
My eyes don't need to see your face
To know your grace is real.

Lord, your mighty love is strong enough
Even now my soul remembers you. Somehow.
I don't need the veil to part,
I can feel you.
In every corner of my heart.

I don't need a wondrous sight
To know you're divine.
'Cause even though I can't see,
I feel your power changing me.

Lord, your mighty love is strong enough
Even now my soul remembers you. Somehow.
I don't need the veil to part,
I can feel you.
In every corner of my heart.
I can feel you.
In every corner of my heart.

I'm not sure why I have been so attached to this song lately. Maybe it's because I've started to realize that Christ really does need to occupy every corner of my heart. I have forgotten to add Christ into everything I do. And I really need to get back into that.

I must admit, my potty mouth has gotten pretty bad lately. I hadn't really noticed how terrible it was until I was hanging out with some friends the other night. We were standing in Clinton's kitchen (oh, by Clinton, I really mean Stephen Graham. Long story.) and I was talking to Janessa and Chelsea... Janessa had said something to which I responded with a "hell-to-the-no"... and Nick Chappell started laughing... and said, "Oh, Brindi. You sure know how to drive The Spirit out." I know he kinda meant it as a joke and just to give me a hard time, but I have really been thinking about it a lot lately. I need to INVITE The Spirit, not drive The Spirit away. I am so grateful to be a part of this group of friends!! I'm sure some days they wonder why they let me hang out with them, but I know it is because I need them. They are so amazing! So I'm sorry guys! I promise to get better! I love all of you. Thanks for trying to get me back on the straight and narrow. :) And thanks for being the best distraction on Sunday night. I know most of you don't know why we had to have a movie night on Sunday night, but it was because I had had a REALLY bad day, and I needed something to capture my attention so I wouldn't think about what was happening in my life. Chels, thanks for putting it all together! Janessa and Jared, thanks for coming with Chels! Clinton, thanks for not really ignoring our texts and coming after dinner at your sister's! ;) Nick, thanks for letting me bug you about leaving your sister's house and then coming. And Bryce, thanks for coming to hang out after a REEEALLY long day of traveling! You are all the best! I really appreciate all of you for coming over and hanging out! I really do love you all.

Finally... one more church song to leave you off. It's another one I've been thinking about lately. It's a primary song. And I LOVE it. It is: If the Savior Stood Beside Me. And the message is so perfect! If you haven't heard it and you know any kids in primary, have them sing it for you! :)

If the Savior stood beside me, would I do the things I do?
Would I think of His commandments and try harder to be true?
Would I follow His example?
Would I live more righteously, if I could see the Savior standing nigh, watching over me?

If the Savior stood beside me, would I say the things I say?
Would my words be true and kind, if He were never far away?
Would I try to share the gospel?
Would I speak more reverently, if I could see the Savior standing nigh, watching over me?

He is always near me, though I do not see Him there.
And because He loves me dearly, I am in His watchful care.
So I'll be the kind of person, that I know I'd like to be.
If I could see the Savior standing nigh, watching over me.

The Phone Call....

On Monday I was sitting at home and my phone starts to ring... So I pick up my phone and I see that it's a call from my sister, Misty. So I answer my phone with a hello... (like normal people do..) and I don't hear anything for a second, then all of the sudden I hear....

Hehwo? 

(in the cutest little Mia voice, EVER!)

I instantly melted. She has the cutest little voice! And I LOOOVE the way she says hello! So a phone call from Miss Mia was nearly Heaven on Earth! haha But... believe it or not.. the story gets better!

Misty called me because Mia kept walking around the house saying, "Bee? Bee? Where Bee?" So they called Bee!! Mia loved finding Bee on the phone! Misty was holding the phone for Mia so she kept telling Mia to say "Hi Bee!" So I'd say Hi Mias! and she'd say... Hi!! Hi!! or Hehwo? And then she'd say Bee? Bee? So I'd talk to her and she'd giggle and say Hi Bee! Then Misty was saying something and got interrupted because Mia had to kiss her! (Mia LOVES giving kisses!!) And then I heard this MUAH! Mia had kissed me through the phone!! It was the most delicious thing! She is so stinkin cute! And at the end of the call she said Bye! Love you.

YUP! I almost died! It was the best phone call I have ever received!!

In a world of numb....

Numb.

         That's the best way to describe it. The way I'm feeling.

                                       I don't even know where to begin.

How to put it. Or what to say.......

Life definitely has it's own coarse, doesn't it?

The shitty part of it all... we have no control over it.

No say. Whatsoever.

Not an option to pass this trial on.

Trade it for a new one.

There is no trading.

So what do you do?

How do you help the ones you love?

Who are hurting the most.

How do you take the pain away?

How do you stop the tears from falling?

How do you continue to be a rock,

when those around you crumble?

Why does it seem your world falls apart

and everything falls at the same time?

Why isn't there a pause button for life?

A chance to make time stop...

Just for a few minutes...

To be able to enjoy what you've got.

Before it all falls apart.

Before you fall apart.

Why can't life be fair?

Why do some people's trials repeat?

over and over and over and over.

Why is saying goodbye so hard?

Like I said earlier... I don't even know where to begin. So many thoughts, so many feelings. I hate when bad news all comes around at the same time. Years ago we went through this episode where every time we went to Bear Lake... we'd come home to bad news... I almost feel that we are about to begin the cycle again.

They say things happen in threes... but I'm really hoping we don't get anymore bad news.. for a long time.

Happening number one: A couple of weeks ago we found out our family friend's brain tumor is back... and quickly growing. The doctors have told him there is no longer anything they can do medically. The chemo and radiation did nothing. And I'm sure we don't have much time left. Blaine has an excellent attitude about it, and it is comforting to know he is at peace with the whole thing. However, it still doesn't make saying goodbye any easier.

Happening number two: About a week and a half ago I was at my cousin's house, cutting hair. I have been sooo lucky to be able to go over there! I have been there a few times to mess up her kitchen floor and make her boys look more handsome with fresh haircuts! Things with the baby had slowly started to go down hill. A couple months ago we thought we would only get a couple more weeks left to be around Saydria's delightful spirit.. but then she seemed to stay pretty neutral for another month or so... about three weeks ago they put in a feeding tube and Miss Saydria had a little more energy. I was over there a few days after it was put in and she was so smiley, talkative, and attentive. It was the cutest thing to just lay by her and talk to her. Hold her tiny little hand. And tell her I love her. She had gotten a little bit of a cold, so they were keeping a really close eye on her. It was a little scary for Kiri, but I think Saydria was doing pretty good. Then a little over a week ago it was time for me to do a couple haircuts.. (Kiri has her boys' haircuts staggered.. So it was time for Aiden and Wesley to get cuts...) Little Miss Saydria was downstairs hanging out with us! It was so fun to have her in the room and listen to her little voice. I had no idea that a week and two days later we would get that dreaded call. Last night we got the call that Saydria had passed away. We knew it would happen, but it's still not any easier to say goodbye.

Sometimes life just isn't fair. I know this is all a part of our Heavenly Father's plan. It makes it a little easier to deal with. Knowing I will get to see both of them again. But it is still a hard thing to go through.

I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to know Saydria! Even though she was only 6 months old, she was such an amazing spirit! She taught me so much in her short time with our family! I am so grateful Kiri and Casey let us get to know her! Miss Saydria, your sweet spirit will be missed.

 

I'm also very grateful to know Blaine. What an amazing man! He has been through so much. And worked so hard to be where he is now. I am so glad he was our neighbor. and my best friend. I will miss him so much! I will hate not having him at my wedding, but I know he'll be there in spirit, and for that I am very grateful!! I'm also very grateful we still have a little bit of time to spend with him.

I thank Heavenly Father for placing these people in my life! :)